The Hidden Dynamics of Child Marriage in South Sudan

(OPINION / Dr Koiti Emmily) – The Masculine Power We Must Examine to End Child Marriage in South Sudan

If you ask quietly, especially among highly educated and professionally established South Sudanese men, a familiar pattern often appears.

A man studies, succeeds and secures employment. He moves among educated women as university classmates, colleagues and peers. Yet in those spaces, something unsettles him. The women ask questions. They challenge ideas and expect partnership, not control. They expect intellectual and emotional depth.

Then the narrative changes.

“Educated women are difficult.”
“They do not submit.”
“They are not wife material.”

But perhaps the real difficulty is this: partnership requires equality. Equality demands security and self-awareness that education alone does not guarantee. It requires a form of masculinity that many men have not been socialised to develop.

When persuasion fails among equals, another path often emerges.

A younger girl, sometimes under age, enters the picture. She may still be in primary or secondary school and come from a modest background. She is raised in a setting where marriage is presented as the highest achievement, and being chosen by a man is seen as elevation.

Meetings begin between the man and the girl. They are supervised, respectable and described as “protective”. Nothing appears improper. Yet beneath the surface, a long courtship is unfolding before adulthood has begun.

She is told she is fortunate. Her family is told they are blessed. Quietly, her options narrow. Other suitors are discouraged. The timeline stretches.

Meanwhile, she is still under age.

By the time she reaches legal adulthood, consent appears clear on paper. But what came before it? Years of influence, shaping and psychological positioning.

The law recognises 18 or 21 years of age. But power has been at work long before that birthday.

Bride price negotiations begin. Resources are mobilised. Sometimes this is done openly. Sometimes not. A system that already struggles with public trust becomes linked to private ambition.

Marriage follows.

In her early twenties, as a newly married woman, she may relocate to Kampala, Nairobi or elsewhere. Childbearing begins. Sexual dynamics unfold within a foundation she did not fully build. Questioning feels unfamiliar. Equality feels distant. Partnership feels theoretical.

As these men advance in their careers and income, which do not automatically bring emotional maturity, the imbalance within such marriages often becomes clearer. When a relationship is built on managed vulnerability rather than equal partnership, dissatisfaction quietly grows.

Then comes the irony.

The same men who chose younger wives because they could not sustain intellectual exchange with women their own age later criticise those same women when they speak out against child marriage. They call them difficult, proud, too educated or unsuitable for marriage. They openly or subtly defend child marriage whenever the issue arises.

We must be honest.

Child marriage is not sustained by culture alone.
It is sustained by insecurity.
It is sustained by power imbalance.
It is sustained by systems that reward dominance over partnership.

If we are serious about protecting girls, we must examine not only poverty and tradition, but also forms of masculinity that fear equality.

Turning 18 does not erase years of grooming that may have come before.
A wedding does not make a power imbalance sacred.
Legality does not guarantee justice.

This is not an attack on men.

It is a call to question the quiet structures that allow unequal foundations to pass as love.

If we want stronger families, healthier marriages and a just society, we must build them on mutual maturity, not managed vulnerability.

Dr Koiti Emmily is a physician, a Sexual and Reproductive Health and Rights (SRHR) specialist, and a coach on the ICF-ACC pathway. She writes on health policy, governance, leadership, and peacebuilding. To join her growing community, follow her on  Facebook.

DISCLAIMER

Access Radio® offers its opinion pages as a forum for public debate. The views expressed are solely those of the author and do not represent the official position of Access Radio® or its editorial team.

Contributors are responsible for the accuracy of their content. Send your opinion to news [at] radioyei.org. Submissions may be edited at our discretion.